Wednesday, October 13, 2004

So, Grandma’s obit came out in the local paper this week, and once again, my legitimacy as a member of the family has been snubbed because I’m a big ‘mo. Shame shame shame that the big fag deviant has bestowed upon our honorable family name

The entire weekend I was home, Scott and Jen were the center of attention since they are having a baby soon – no issues there, but then Grant was ‘belle of the ball number two’ since he and Tara have been together for two whole whopping years – oooh, there must be wedding bells on the horizon, no doubt! The entire conversations on these topics blew my mind. I let out a big guffaw that Owen picked up on but I decided not to comment on it to him any further. It had only been a few days previous that I informed Mom that Joe and I were celebrating our fourth year anniversary. What do you think the response was from her and the rest of the family? Complete denial. I was pissed off enough, and then the final snub in the obit. Everyone’s significant other is mentioned, even Tara….and Joe was conveniently omitted. Like, adding a single name to the entire list was going to be something anyone would notice. So much for family bonding. They’ve essentially denied the truth about my life because they’re ashamed. I’m REALLY pissed off.

I’ll never forget what my mom said to me the day I came out to them.

“We don’t want it to end up that something happens so that you don’t want to come home anymore.”

Well mother, keep at it - you’re doing an exemplary job of demonstrating tolerance and giving me less and less reason to visit Grandview. My lifestyle and partner are such an abomination to you, well frickin’ get over it. The rest of civilized society is. How do you think it makes be feel to be excluded from things simply because you don’t agree with something I do? You aren’t the only people in this family, you know.

Next time Grandma Ostrowski asks me when I’m getting married, I’ll give her a freaking date. I’m almost ready to do this out of spite….thanks for all your support, family. It’s been a hard enough journey despite you to get to the point where I am, and then to discover that the traits I found so honorable in my family were all just a big fabrication. Nice.

I won’t forget this. Don’t expect any invitations to a wedding anytime soon.